The Power of the Pause.
“Experience is not the best teacher, evaluated experience is.”
–John Maxwell
The leadership Law of Reflection teaches us that learning to pause allows growth to catch up with us. I’m writing about this today because it’s one of the chapters we’re discussing in our noon mastermind. AND this morning in my reflection time, I felt this inner tension to chuck it and move forward quickly into my day. Hmmm…Seems like I’ve been fighting that urge often lately. I also realized that I was skipping the short time-outs that allow me to catch my breath during the day. That makes for a chaotic life for me.
Usually that chaos manifests itself in my relationships. I don’t take time to nourish them and be present in them. My mind is moving too fast toward the future to do that. Not good, not good at all.
There is an old joke that experience is a hard teacher because the test is given first and the lesson is given afterward. Ha. Ha. After a huge problem or challenge, it is so easy for me to say, “I am sooooo glad that’s over! Whew!” I have found that a much better thing to say is, “what can I learn from it?” If we don’t take the time to evaluate or reflect on the experience, we may never learn the lesson intended for us.
“Experience is not the best teacher…evaluated experience is.” John Maxwell.
As leaders, most of us are so busy trying to keep up with the demands of our lives, that we don’t take the time to reflect on our lives.We are so action oriented that we neglect to take the time to think. Some times we can miss what John calls “life markers.” These are important events that can really signal a time for transition,change or transformation. We can miss the significance of these experiences for us.
Lack of reflection can also cause us to not learn from a failure or mistake. If we don’t learn from those, we can repeat them. An evaluated failure or mistake can transform into a valuable learning tool. Our failures and mistakes can actually make us better!
Conversely, reflecting on our successes, blessings and on the things we did right, can make us happy. Reflecting on the good in our lives also makes us grateful. Being grateful causes joy! Without reflecting on the good we’ve done, it’s easy for us to forget about the success and focus on our failures.
Henri J. M. Nouwen observed, “When you are able to create a lonely place in the middle of your actions and concerns, your successes and failures slowly can lose some of their power over you.”
Pausing with intention expands and enriches our thinking. Study the lives of people who have had tremendous impact on the world and you will find that many of them spent a considerable amount of time thinking.
Steve Jobs took time in the morning, no matter what time he woke up to re-evaluate his work and desires. He looked in the mirror and asked, “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” If the answer was “no” for far too long, he would change something.
Benjamin Franklin would eat dinner at 5:00, listen to music, have quiet conversation and then reflect on his day before going to bed at 10:00.
Find a place to think and discipline yourself to pause, even if it’s a small block of time. It has the potential to change your life and can help you figure out what’s really important and what isn’t.
Taking time to pause this weekend, I made a course correction to become more intentional in slowing down during the day. I’m grateful I did. I’m sure those relationships that were getting short changed are thankful, too.
Happily typed,
Jan
Jan McDonald
The John Maxwell Team
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